Friday, September 23, 2011

We Forgot the Ceremony!

 Image via Chicago Now

It seems like with everything that goes into planning a wedding, sometimes the ceremony is overlooked. Just me? Fine! I've put most of my energy into picking the right photographer, food and minutiae that I forgot all about the ceremony. Like, seriously. Whoops!

Somewhere during the initial stages of Operation Wedding, I briefly scribbled down what I wanted for the ceremony. In fact Mr. Warbs and I sat down to write separate lists of what we wanted for the wedding. We then read over each other's list and crossed off three things we didn't agree with. At the time Mr. Warbs thought this was a list of what we wanted in life in general. Which is why his first pick is Shakey's Bunch a Lunch. Never make your fiance do wedding activities on an empty stomach ladies.

My list might have been a tad longer.

Aside from my horrible penmanship and spelling errors, I'm really sad that I didn't include anything regarding the actual ceremony. You know that thing that actually unites us as husband and wife? So Mr. Warbs and I sat down to talk about what we wanted. We both agreed that we didn't want a super long ceremony. Surprisingly, Mr. Warbs agreed that we would write our own vows. He is painfully shy and doesn't usually like being the center of attention. But he is dead set on writing vows that will either make me cry or make my face melt from the super awesomeness. We have a bet going to see who will cry first. 

Aside from writing our own vows, I also wanted to include a small ceremony within the ceremony. At my cousin's wedding, she used the ever popular Unity Candle. I'm not sure if this is a component in every Unity Candle ceremony, but my cousin had her mother and her husband's mother each light a candle. The mothers placed their candles on the small table at the altar and the bride and groom lit the large candle with their mothers' candles and them out. Mr. Warbs was NOT a fan of this, because to him it represented removing the mothers from the bride and groom's life.

Next up, we looked at Unity Sand. It is basically the same as the Unity Candle, except you're pouring different colored sand into a container. You then display the sand somewhere in your home. I wasn't a fan of this one, because it just didn't seem to fit our personalities. And I could just see one of us knocking over the sand one day.


Lastly, we checked out the Wine Box and Love Letter ceremony. I've never heard of this or seen it at another wedding before so I was intrigued. During the ceremony, the bride and groom place two glasses, a bottle of wine and sealed letters to each other in a box and nail it shut. If the couple should ever have trouble in their marriage, before making any rash decisions they would open the box, drink some wine and read each others' letters. If the couple doesn't have any problems they can open the box on a major wedding anniversary. 

This tradition appealed to us the most, not just because we drink a lot of wine (we drink a TON of wine), but also because it's realistic. More than half of marriages end in divorce. Nobody is perfect, everyone has problems whether they're big or small. I think it's honest to acknowledge that sometimes we all need a fail safe to get through it.

What traditions are you incorporating in your ceremony?

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